Esto, que llevo dentro
Short | Nonfiction | 6’ | 2023 | U.S.A., Colombia
16mm, VHS
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In a letter to an artist lost to suicide at age twenty-eight, a filmmaker revisits his own battle with a rare anxiety disorder, forging an intimate relationship with his mother.
Through a personal letter written to artist Daniel Segura Bonnett, the son of Colombian author Piedad Bonnett, Esto, que llevo dentro carries a disruptive essayistic structure, led by the sound of the filmmaker’s voice and improvisational jazz drumming. Through visual metaphors found in street fixtures and desolate, natural landscapes around San Francisco, the filmmaker aims to represent feelings of anguish, disillusionment and terror upon a never-ending cycle of intrusive thoughts. The film uses a collection of personal VHS archives and intermittent shots of the filmmaker’s body, to move across time and space, aiming to question ideas of remembrance, resilience and self-acceptance.
Selections
Thin Line Exhibit, 2023 (Denton, TX)
Bogotá Experimental Film Festival, 2023
Philadelphia Latino Film Festival, 2023
Vancouver Latino Film Festival, 2023
Seattle Latino Film Festival, 2023
Festival de Cine de Bogotá, 2023
Cinestesia Awards, Colombia, 2023 (Best Documentary Short Award - Nominee)
International Video Poetry Festival, 2024
The Institute for Experimental Arts, 2024 (Athens, Greece)
A film by
Enrique Pedráza-Botero
Featuring
Luz Maria Botero
Additional Camera
Sruti Visweswaran
Production Assistant
Lauren Howell
Technical Support
Mark Urbanek
Paul Meyers
Faculty Advisors
Srđan Keča
Jan Krawitz
Special Thanks
Piedad Bonnett
Original Music
Enrique Pedráza-Botero
Made with the support of:
Pacific Pioneer Fund
Produced in the Documentary Film M.F.A. Program
Department of Art & Art History
Stanford University
![Esto, que llevo dentro]()
Short | Nonfiction | 6’ | 2023 | U.S.A., Colombia
16mm, VHS
In a letter to an artist lost to suicide at age twenty-eight, a filmmaker revisits his own battle with a rare anxiety disorder, forging an intimate relationship with his mother.
Through a personal letter written to artist Daniel Segura Bonnett, the son of Colombian author Piedad Bonnett, Esto, que llevo dentro carries a disruptive essayistic structure, led by the sound of the filmmaker’s voice and improvisational jazz drumming. Through visual metaphors found in street fixtures and desolate, natural landscapes around San Francisco, the filmmaker aims to represent feelings of anguish, disillusionment and terror upon a never-ending cycle of intrusive thoughts. The film uses a collection of personal VHS archives and intermittent shots of the filmmaker’s body, to move across time and space, aiming to question ideas of remembrance, resilience and self-acceptance.
Selections
Thin Line Exhibit, 2023 (Denton, TX)
Bogotá Experimental Film Festival, 2023
Philadelphia Latino Film Festival, 2023
Vancouver Latino Film Festival, 2023
Seattle Latino Film Festival, 2023
Festival de Cine de Bogotá, 2023
Cinestesia Awards, Colombia, 2023 (Best Documentary Short Award - Nominee)
International Video Poetry Festival, 2024
The Institute for Experimental Arts, 2024 (Athens, Greece)
A film by
Enrique Pedráza-Botero
Featuring
Luz Maria Botero
Additional Camera
Sruti Visweswaran
Production Assistant
Lauren Howell
Technical Support
Mark Urbanek
Paul Meyers
Faculty Advisors
Srđan Keča
Jan Krawitz
Special Thanks
Piedad Bonnett
Original Music
Enrique Pedráza-Botero
Made with the support of:
Pacific Pioneer Fund
Produced in the Documentary Film M.F.A. Program
Department of Art & Art History
Stanford University
